• sweet nothings • When parents, friends, and lovers alike ..
Added 2023-12-08 02:33:04 +0000 UTC• sweet nothings • When parents, friends, and lovers alike have proven to us time and time again that their words mean nothing unless they are filled with venom, we develop a belief that sweet nothings are quite literally that, nothing. Meaningless nonsense, a means to an end. Courting has been reduced to pickup lines that are reused and recycled again and again. “You take eachothers clothes off before sex, but get dressed alone” is more accepted than healthy aftercare. And even if aftercare was more normalized, why would we believe them or feel truly safe? People are flakey and fickle and we don’t know if we will ever find any consistency in relationships. These beliefs from our past experiences blend into our relationships, romantic and otherwise. In my own relationship, the first time we had sex M set a boundary that she didn't want me to use her name, as a way to shield her heart. This of course, has been changed in the time of us being together. We’ve even gathered many more names for each other. Through our years together over and over we consistently prove the bias in our head wrong and we’ve learned to lean on each other, to teach each other that love is worth being vulnerable. Love means trusting that the compliments and praise our partners give us are true to them. We don’t invalidate their experiences, including their perspective on being with us. Sleezy pick up lines turn into corny jokes, late night compliments are now daily truths sprinkled in conversation, pillow talk Saturday nights is now a hello every morning, and sweet nothings become .. well everything.
