Don't swipe unless you wanna shatter the illusion of me bein..
Added 2024-06-30 17:00:19 +0000 UTCDon't swipe unless you wanna shatter the illusion of me being some sort of perfect sex doll 🫣
Image #1 is my ideal pose, sucking it in and arching my back. Image #2 is the opposite 🥲
This is the body I've been scared to show. It's contributed to why I've been finding it so hard to make content. I've been through the wringer with all the insecurities you can imagine. Watching back videos where I can't stop focusing on the things I don't like makes it so hard to edit.
When I lived in the mountains, I came into possession of a deep fryer. Before that, I worked in a kitchen for a number of years so let's just say I **know** how to use a deep fryer 🤣 I ended up gaining almost 30 pounds over the winter from making the best damn buttermilk chicken fingers in the world every week 😭😭😭 i swear, it was the beginning of my self doubt and subsequent downfall on onlyfans. Being hormonal from estrogen and progesterone definitely didn't help. I need to feel confident and sexy to pull it off, but I didn't feel that way anymore. It took me over a year to find the missing piece of the puzzle. Self love and self respect are the only thing that can help me reach my goals. If I tell myself I'm gonna go to the gym, I'm gonna do it! Otherwise I'll be spitting on my own aspirations and *that* will make me truly feel like garbage. So I've found a piece of truth that already made me feel empowered and confident. I'm beautiful with or without these pounds. But I'm going to hit the gym anyways because it feels good and makes me proud of myself! Fuck the haters that live in my brain. They were wrong. Here's to the bottom of a downward spiral and the start of an upward spiral! 🌀😵💫🥰
