Warning long winded existential emo post ahead 🫣😳 Also: What..

Warning long winded existential emo post ahead 🫣😳 Also: What kind of content do you want to see? I made the mistake of making stuff I personally thought was sexy without considering you guys, so my last campaign flopped. Sometimes you just have to take the L and it’s okay! Pretty much as soon as I touch down in LA I’m gonna make new content to make up for it ❤️

I’d do it here but I’m in transit most of the time; even rn I’m on a train. Choo chooooooo 😜

You know, I’d like to operate under the delusion that I’m ballin and the mental gymnastics that I can step away from work anytime, but the truth is debts are real and this platform isn’t making me wealthy. I’m so lucky that it can pay my bills and I’m grateful as hell! I seriously love my job. It’s the best. However I can’t entirely enjoy my vacation and go off the grid like I want to, because I still have to log on, tetris in my head what sexy stuff to post, promo on the socials, and film myself naked every day. Full disclosure this trip was provided by my mom as an early birthday gift 💝 cuz the prices to travel are cheaper now that on my actual upcoming bday. I have an existential bday coming up. My parents haven’t supported me financially since I was 18 and I hardly talk to my family so being with my mom and getting a bit of help from her is a huge deal to me. This is also a wonderful opportunity to attend the Rome film festival, soak up culture, eat amazing food…..

Network, navigate, nastya. Girlboss gaslight gatekeep. Thank god for xanax and copious amounts of coffee haha so I’m in this midway state between feeling deeply enlightened and internally suffering. The veil is thin now and the boundaries of reality are psychedelically dissolving.

Like I said if the campaign for my psych stuff doesn’t reach, I will redo it and refilm my XXX content as many times as needed for it to reach. Yes I may be complaining rn, but I’m not a sob story, I’m a strong ass resilient bitch who has seen agony and suffering and misery and trauma who just wants to get better. One day I’ll be a baller foreal and not have to rely on things like this, but until my delusion of personal wealth becomes a reality, I cum SERVING to SLAY and HUSTLE and GRIND 😤

I’m fully aware of the burnout that’s about to ensue but I have a reawakened sense of self that’s come with traveling / subconscious mind filling in the blanks due to sleep deprivation, and even tho I feel shitty and disappointed in myself, I also feel very strong and determined to succeed at any cost. This Italian voyage is like a religious experience of self discovery I stg— this is why I have a team of therapists hahah so that I don’t overshare and unload and trauma bomb you guys with this super intense emo shit… like honestly I could go on and on all day but I will stop myself here. The insane ravings of a hornii madwoman who thinks she’s the lovechild of Hunter Thompson and Sasha Grey … one day it can be confined to my Cyberhorny book and project instead of here. I know y’all are here for porno but sorry, I give good headache 💘

I’m selfish, aren’t we all a bit?

So yeah lmk about the content you want!! I’d like to both please you, and afford them therapy bills I badly need, at the same time. Let me know how I can improve my page. Grazzzii 💕💕🧚‍♀️